WE ARE DTC!!!! (Dossier to China)

Let the countdown begin!
I can't wait to finally meet my baby girl!

I'm typing this on the wii... I need a new computer.

Almost there, nesting, excited and scared!!!!

Our dossier is finally on its way to Carol Fredericks in D.C. for final authentication from the Chinese Embassy. It really could have been on its way a month ago, but it took FOREVER to get the correct letter from our accountant.

I have been so calm with this paperchase and I don't know why?? I keep wondering is it because I have a two year old? Because I have three teenagers? Am I worried about the money? Maybe I'm too old to do this again? Will Jie Ling's world be so shattered by a new baby that she'll never recover and she'll be in counseling for life? I love having Jie Ling! Just her and I, it's a piece of cake. (well not always) I'm scared!! I still feed her, she has to sit in my lap every morning when we share our bowl of cereal, and she knows when it's her turn to drink the last little bit of milk, and then share the rest with Poppy, our overweight cat. She still wears diapers, and I don't think she's close to pottytraining. She tells me her legs don't work so I carry her a lot! How will I carry two babies? How will I get two babies in the car? How will I shop? Are they going to fight 24/7? I hate it when she screams!!! Oh boy. We finally have our routine down pat. It took a year and I'm not kidding. She even stands like a little soldier next to the sink when I brush her teeth, and I know to fake putting on toothpast or she'll cry. She knows how I do things, and I know how she does hers.

BUT, then I think about my baby Xiao Ya. That little girl in the 3 pictures I have, who needs a mommy to hold her, and kiss her, and to sing her silly songs, (my kids hate my singing, even Jie Ling shushes me) to know the love of a family, and the most amazing awesome grandparents who have been studying Chinese with a private tutor so they can teach our kids!! Okay now I'm getting all mushy and I hate that!!

I'm sure things will be fine, I remember being so scared before Jie Ling came home that I would wake up in the middle of the night thinking what in the world am I doing!! Maybe we shouldn't do this, what if Jie Ling is seriously ill and has way more than macrodactyly!! What if, what if, what if? I never confided in anyone but Aimee my then 12 year old!!

Anyways, I'm rambling now...I did nest all weekend, and moved Jie Ling into her big girl bed (right next to ours) and pushed the crib to another wall. I joked with Mike that our room could still fit a few more beds, and he gave me a dirty look!! Jie Ling did not really like the new bed, but refused to sleep in the crib since it was so far away on the other side of the room! She stood next to her bed and just laid her head on it until she fell asleep. I wasn't going to fight with her royal majesty!

Anyways, goodbye!

Oh I just have to post Jie Ling's newest sayings.

* I'm sick of it!

* Oh no, I'm hungry again!

* My legs don't work.

* "Mommy, Aimee's mean to me!"

* I like that song, it's beautiful.

* Mommy you have a headache?

* I need chocolate!

* Shit (I think she's saying ship?)

* Mommy don't leave me!

* No way

* "Hey," said to strangers, "Look at my leg!" (pointing to her prosthetic leg)

* "Mommy, I'm beautiful!" Yes, baby you are beautiful.